Tuesday, June 30, 2009
What the Hell Theatre - 6/30
A man decided to give himself a circumcision with TOENAIL CLIPPERS!? The man, who was rushed to the hospital... then mental ward for observation. Disclaimer, Doctors say this kind of thing is BAD,The results can be quite horrific and long-lasting and have quite an affect on a man's sexual performance. *** Thanks to Amanda Carper for passing this story along.
Utah's Bureau of Land Management is asking residents not to use their old televisions for target practice. They say since the switch to digital television many people have been shooting their old TVs, computer monitors and cell phones. The bureau says the practice could be hazardous because the electronics contains potentially toxic elements.
A Coconut Creek, Florida man died yesterday morning after trying to knock mangoes from a tree. Thanhkim Giang was electrocuted after his 23-foot aluminum pole touched a high-voltage wire. His wife, Day Giang, was injured when she tried to push him away from the live wire. She is expected to survive.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Friday, June 26, 2009
What the Hell Theatre - 6/26
The Salt Lake City police recently arrested a drunk driver who claimed he was from another planet. The man was originally stopped for not having his lights on. When asked if he had been drinking he said, "Yes," and claimed he was "from the planet Alpha Omega." As cops were handcuffing the 'alien' he said, "Tonight I started getting my binge on."
Curtis Jones recently used a cardboard toilet paper holder to escape from a Columbia, Missouri jail. He jammed his cell door and then fled when his jailer went to another building. Cops captured Jones after receiving an anonymous tip. He was originally detained for stealing anhydrous ammonia, a chemical used to manufacture methamphetamine.
Thomas Daley is facing 151 years in prison for illegally videotaping 34 women, who rented apartments from him. The Phoenixville PA landlord hid cameras behind mirrors and in ceiling fans and watched many women live on his home computer. Daley started taped from 1989 all the way up until his arrest in September 2008
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
What the Hell Theatre - 6/24
The Myrtle Beach police are searching for an 18-year-old white man who was accidentally released when he pretended to be a 34-year-old black man. Richard Daniel Wines was in the middle of a five-day sentence for public intoxication when he told guards he was Jonathan Jermain Gardner.
A Vermont highway was closed yesterday after a truck carrying 40,000 pounds of beer overturned. The 18 wheeler landed in a swamp as drivers swerved to avoid the suds. The highway was closed for several hours. The truck driver was not hurt
A pregnant, 31-year-old Springfield, Massachusetts woman is OK after accidentally backing her car off the fourth story of a parking garage. The unidentified victim, who was alone in her car at the time, placed her Hyundai Sonata in reverse before plunging 40 feet to the sidewalk below. She was treated for minor injuries and released.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
What the Hell Theatre - 6/23
A 17 year-old Brasov, Romania teen recently died while Twittering. Maria Barbu was taking a bath and Tweeting when she dropped her laptop in the water. She was instantly electrocuted. Police believe Maria was trying to plug in her laptop because the battery had died.
An Austrian student recently woke up in the cab of a 150-foot-high crane. Stefan Hohenwart told the Graz police he had been drinking the night before and had no idea how he ended up in the crane. A police spokesman says, "The crane operator got quite a surprise when he went up and found the student snoring away in his cab. When our officers got there and get the man down he swore he had no idea how he got up there and just remembers leaving the pub and feeling very tired."
A Syracuse woman was recently arrested for keying a squad car. She first called 911 to report that the police car was blocking her car. Then, she keyed the vehicle because the officers didn't move it quickly enough. Officers charged her with criminal mischief.
Monday, June 22, 2009
What the Hell Theatre - 6/22
A Belgium bus driver may lose her job because she also works as a porn star. The woman, who is the reigning Miss Nude Belgium 2009, passed all of her driving tests following a six week intensive course. 'Audrey' says she was called into Human Resources after her bosses saw her nude Website. "I was asked to choose between my erotic career and my new career on the buses.
The Cocoa Beach, Florida police recently arrested Miranda Marie Peters for robbing a Wendy's while her 4 year-old was in the backseat. The 33 year-old was high on crack when she sped away from the restaurant and led cops on a short chase that ended with her car being disabled by some stop sticks.
Carol Burdick says she was evicted from her Boulder, Colorado apartment for failing to remove her Easter decorations in a timely manner. Easter stickers, plastic grass, and Peeps marshmallow candies were still hanging on her door two weeks after the holiday ended. Her landlord says she was booted because she failed to keep her balcony, patio and other areas "in a clean sanitary condition."
Friday, June 19, 2009
What the Hell Theatre - 6/19
The pilot of a Continental Airlines flight from Brussels to Newark died over the Atlantic Ocean yesterday. His two co-pilots landed the jet without any problems. The 60-year-old Newark-based pilot is believed to have suffered a heart attack. Dr. Julien Struyven says the pilot was dead when she reached him in the cockpit.
A Madison, Alabama man was recently arrested for trying to pass a fake $100 bill at a local McDonald's. A cashier called 911 after receiving the funny money. When cops raided the man's home they found over $16,000 in fake C notes.
A Russian father is recovering from having his penis sliced off by his son. The two were drinking when they made a drunken bet on who could down more. The son won and cut off his father’s penis. Doctors successfully reattached the severed member.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Homer as your GPS?
Tom-Tom has just released a GPS system for your car that has HOMER as your guide. Click here to listen to a few samples of his directions.
What the Hell Theatre - 6/18
Haylie Hocking canceled her wedding on Monday after finding out that her fiance, Jason Brake, is a British adult film star. Her best friend discovered his secret after she searched online for a male stripper. He originally told her he was a personal trainer.
The Puerto Rico police recently arrested a man for stealing 88 pieces of underwear from his neighbor's clothesline. He took over $1,000 worth of panties in less than a year. The police returned all of the underwear to the victim.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Look who was on the air w/ Jim Bone
Kevin Martin from Candlebox took over 979X this morning with Jim Bone.
He dropped by to show off some new ink... and pick all of the music on Bone's show.
Click for more
What the Hell Theatre - 6/17
Noreen F. Menard was recently charged with a DUI while on her way to an AA meeting. Other drivers called 911 after seeing the 48 year-old swerving in and out of lanes and drinking from a Boston Vodka bottle. When the cop pulled her over she said, “Is this going to take long? I am late for my AA meeting. If you arrest me I’m going to jail for two years.”
The Union City, NJ police recently arrested Wilfredo Valdes for calling emergency operators 21 times to get rides to and from the hospital. The 69 year-old says he called for help because he wanted to avoid paying cab fare.
Lao Du recently had a needle removed from his rear end. He says the broken syringe had been stuck in his bottom for 31 years. "I got a cold and went to see an amateurish doctor in my hometown village, but the needle broke off once it pierced my bum. After being hospitalized for nine days, doctors checked me but failed to find the broken needle. Even walking became a suffering to me."
Skinny Chick VS Fat Chick Bull Riding...
Hot Chick vs Fat Chick Mechanical Bull - Watch more Funny Videos
On a side note our dumbass lawyers keep telling me not to call them "fat chicks"... they also ask me not to call them "dumbass lawyers".
Hi I'm Lindsay!
Hi, I'm Lindsay Lohan. I bitch about the paparazzi all the time, about how they "invade my privacy" and "disrespect my personal space". Then I twitter topless photos of myself!!!
Yeahhhhhhhh!
btw, i twitter too... sometimes i twitter topless pictures of myself too!
twitter.com/mckay979x
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
What the Hell Theatre - 6/16
A 37 year-old Glendale, Arizona man is recovering from shooting himself in the butt. The unidentified security guard was getting ready for work when his gun discharged as he was placing it in his holster. He was taken to a hospital with non-life threatening injuries.
An 84-year-old Polish woman recently woke up in a hospital morgue after being declared dead by her doctor. An embalmer opened her body bag after he saw it moving. The unidentified woman's huband called for help after she fell unconscious. A doctor from the emergency medical services team pronounced her dead and told medics to take her body to the morgue. The woman was placed in intensive care after she woke up.
The prinicpal of Ohio's Shaker Heights High School, Michael Griffith, has suspended yearbook distribution because a student cleverly concealed the F-word in the cover artwork. He says 'cosmetic surgery' is being performed on the books to block out the offending phrase. During the school's graduation ceremony, the 'artist' received a standing ovation.
A week old Cocker Spaniel is recovering from being flushed down the toilet. Four year-old Daniel Blair placed his pup in the toilet and flushed it because it was muddy and needed a bath. The pooch got stuck in a drainage pipe before a London plumber used a snake camera to free him.
Monday, June 15, 2009
What the Hell Theatre - 6/15
The Las Vegas police recently arrested Jonathan Weaver for tying up his girlfriend's kids so he could watch the Magic and Lakers. The 20 year-old took the 1 and 2 year-old boys out to his garage where he bound them in their car seats, placed hoods on their heads, tied rope around their necks, stuffed cloth in their mouthes, and left them so he could go to a bar to watch the NBA Finals game. He told officers he didn't think leaving the children was a big deal "because they have had campouts inside" the garage before. Weaver is charged with kidnapping, child abuse and attempted murder.
Chandan Baria is recovering from having a 2 pound hairball removed from her stomach. The 13 year-old was recently admitted to a New Dehli, India hospital with severe stomach cramps. Doctors X-rayed her before removing the 20-inch hairball. Chandan was diagnosed with Rapunzel syndrome, which is characterized by a repeated urge to pull one’s hair out before eating it
A former Price Is Right contestant is suing the show for injuries he suffered during his appearance. Michael Lerner tripped and fell on a chair as he was running down an aisle to compete on the show. He says he suffered a torn Achilles Tendon and a herniated lumbar discSunday, June 14, 2009
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Friday, June 12, 2009
Up here old guy...
Catherine Zeta Jones gets eye molested by this walking zombie guy...
Just thought you should know.
What the Hell Theatre - 6/12
Al Byrd's Sandy Springs, Georgia home was recently demolished by accident. He says he was at work when he got a call that his house was gone. “We had heirlooms in there…my mom’s dining room set…her hutch with her dishes in there. You can’t imagine. The demolition company said it had paperwork.
Jen Waddell's 11-year-old black Lab mix recently got stoned after eating some marijuana he found in a Seattle area park. She says, "He was just... stoned. His eyes were kind of glossed over, very out of touch. When he was trying to walk, he was looking at his paw, and then looking at the ground and then trying to get his paw to reach the ground, but was unsuccessful. Jack' slept off his high.
A Kentwood, Michigan man was recently arrested for robbing a local Speedway gas station. The unidentified suspect told the station clerk he had a gun and wanted him to empty the register. As soon as he got his cash he fled without realizing he dropped a piece of paper that contained with his name and home address. Detectives arrested the dope an hour after the robbery.
The Boca Raton, Florida police recently arrested two teens for breaking and entering. Neighbors called 911 after they heard glass break and then saw the two punks carrying small electronics from an apartment. Cops quickly arrived and began questioning one of the thieves. He had no stolen merchandise on him, but did receive a text message from his accomplice, who told him where he was hiding. Cops easily arrested both thugs.
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